Know nothing, but Ti amo :)

Was sad because got cheated by friends :) But now, everything is fine :) I have someone better now :) I never want to open my heart for someone until I am older :) And now my heart is open :) For those who will really love me and take care of me :) I ever have someone who will come to me and say ''girl I will take care of you and love you for the rest of my life''. This is the second time, I found someone like this again :) Am I that lucky? Or it is just illusion? When I talk to you, it is like you have gave me strength.... I don't know how to describe the feeling, I have :) When I am with you :) Thank you for singing my favourite song to me, I did said that if someone who sing that to me, I will sure marry him :) Is that going to be you?  Oh, boy... you give me all that I ever wanted. I wish nothing more, but all I want is you, to grow old with  you.  I will tell you how much I love you, through photos :) instead of words :) I will give you the best of me :) And I will sing for you :) I will play the song ''Hero'' for  you :) Just to let you know, how much I love you :) ich liebe dich so sehr!~ :) My life was black and white when I don't know  you :) and now it is better than the rainbow it seems :) The rainbow will be so jealous, just because you exist :) Even the angels will be :) You mean so much to me :) I will give up on my place :) Just for seeing you in real life~ :) I can do nothing, but love you the best that I can :) I won't turn to someone else, just if you are always here :) You are amazing, just the way you are, boy :) <3 I love you so much, everyday :) The feeling is so strong :) Maybe you have swallow a magnet, that's why I cannot pull myself away from you :) You are so important, and all I want to do now, is to find words to describe you :) Ti amo :) <3

Living Without you :)

Freedom......!

I didn't sleep well, last night... maybe I am still having the memories of you. I heard a song that was suggested by my friend :) In another life.. well, that song was basically about can't love you now :) And that's so true~ :) I don't want to have the memories of you :) Even though I was sad about it when I know it is over :) But, I think it is waste of my time, being sad for you :) I should be happy because it happened, you were once with me. Just once and I should remember for life :) I am loved, by someone else :) I think it is time, that I open my heart for someone else :) And you should just leave my heart alone now :) You are no one inside my heart, and basically someone else did :) He is in, He is here :) Always and forever he should be :) You are still important, but just a someone.. a friend or less? :) I am in places, that I never been, or some places that I have been to :) I am seeing new people, new places, new buildings, old people, old places and old buildings. Gaining new things and old things :) Seeing how people and couples walking in and out in my life. Realized that you a just a chapter in my life :) You are not in my life now, and you are my past, after all I realized you are not everything about my life :) I was once happy with you, but now you have got your someone and so, get on with her then :) And not the least, me too, I am the same :) I am free, I am everything :p Thank you for letting me free :) Someday you'll miss me, like I have missed you :) someday you'll need me, just like I needed you :) And when someday you'll love me, I am sorry :) I won't love you :) I know... I know.. You NEVER did miss me :) you don't need me :) And so do I? =))

Hugs, Hugs and Hugs :)

I like hugs from other people, I never get one if I don't hug people. I love being hug by people. It feel really good. Hug gives people a warmth feeling. It is also something good :) I would like to hug anyone :) Just like people who wrote on a paper and says '' free hug''. Someday after my exams I will go to some shopping mall or just some where nearby, and give free hugs to other people. Well, maybe it is not that normal to hug people who is new to you. But, this is a good experience :) And I get hugs too :) Some day in my life, I will get hugs from someone that I love, I hope :) At that time, he will come forward and hug me. I will never take the first step :) Hope he can take note of it :) What could I say? :) I LOVE HUGS! :D <3

My Life? = RED

Asking me about my life? :) Well, I don't know what it holds. I don't know what it means :) What is life? :) Tell me! :) hmmm... if I have to answer that question,  I will say its you :) You have painted my life RED :) Why red? To answer this question, let me go on one by one :) Red, is a bright colour, in Chinese it means good things :) Like love, luck and all that :) Way before this, I thought my life is only a world with black and white :) Full of sadness :) I never know what is happiness :) Until, you exist :) I felt love and happiness :) Love is easy and happiness is easy too :) I don't really like my life, as it is a misery :) Not when I am talking to you :) You are such a sweet dream :) I am a nightmare :) You give me comfort :) And I love it :) I know I won't admit what you have commented about me :) I don't know, if we will meet :) But, if you keep the feelings for me. I will just stay with you :) If you really can do it for me :) I am yours... I am always here, if you need me :) And I know you are here too when I need you here :) I have your number, I can just call you and talk to you <3 I love your voice :) Even, I don't understand :) It is okay, if you don't remember my name :) Someday, I might just be forgotten by you. But, in fact, I will remember you thoughtout my life <3. You meant so much to me, in life :) I don't know why we are so far :( But, I will wait :)

I am not the best, boy

Thank you, boy :) for telling me that I'm the best :)  I know, I am not :) Not in a million years~ :) But I love it when you tell me, I am great :) I am your sweet dreams :) But, as usual, I told you that, I am not the best :) You said, I am amazing :) I am pretty. I am cute. I am sweet :) . Everything sweet you've got me :) I really don't know what I can say :) I cant find a word to describe you, dear :) You said, you can't live without my smile :) And, I got to admit~ :) I can't live without your smile too :) As my song said, your words bring such comfort to me when you've miles apart. This song is just for you :) 'He' is my past :) And hopefully, you are my future :) I love you boy :) I love you for giving me such things :) I love you... I don't know what things I can say.. other than I love you and Thank you. I like European, and you like Asian :) We are the perfect match :) Do you feel the same? :) I can't explain my feeling for you now :) If only we can meet, I am all yours~ :) I love you <3 If I can I will give you millions of hugs :) If you like it :) <3 ILY <3

Guardian Angel

Verse 1:
The day we separates
I just walk away
as if we will meet again
not believing in love
is to lie to myself
until you come back
I'll remain with my smile
look at the stars
praying to the sky
you'll be here
Chorus:
I want you to be my sky
whenever I look up
I'm not alone
you're my Guardian Angel
your words bring such comfort to me
even when you're thousand miles away
when I'm lonely
Verse 2:
I'm living happily
without you in this city
because I feel that
your wings spreads
and protected me away from fears
Now, I've recalled your voice
it is better than Summer and Spring
Chorus :
I want you to be my sky
whenever I look up
I'm not alone
you're my Guardian Angel
your words bring such comfort to me
even when you're thousand miles away
when I'm lonely
Verse 3:This warm afternoon
I've spent thinking about you
When the night comes
and I shut my eyes
I felt that you've kissed my cheek :D
Oh....
my Guardian Angel
I've been missing you so bad
Have you been missing me at all? :)
Chorus:I want you to be my sky
 whenever I look up
 I'm not alone
 you're my Guardian Angel
your words bring such comfort to me
 even you're thousand miles away
 when I'm lonely

I am his world :)

On a cold morning, when I woke up, I could hear birds singing. Such a nice feeling that I could only get once in a while. Was waiting if you can come online today, still I've talked to you yesterday. I was so happy when you said, my smile is the best thing in your world :) Am I your world? :) You said, God have given me the best thing, which is my smile :) Every time when I talk to you, all you tell me is my smile :) You ask me to smile just for you when you are sad. :) Is my smile that powerful to you? :) If yes, I would smile for my whole life, JUST FOR YOU :) The words that you said bring such comfort to me when we're miles apart........ You always says, I am pretty and beautiful. Am I really that? I don't think I am. Maybe it is my smile that make you have that idea... And you always says, I am the best thing in the world :) Maybe all life long, I can only carry this smile with me :) Nothing more than that. If  I can meet you in life, that would be great :) Cause some time in the day, I really think that you've painted some colours in my life :) Thank you, Dear..... <3

Finally

When I woke up today in the morning :) I was full with energy.. maybe the other day,  I was still upset about.. Him :) But now, it is finally alright! :) He have got a girlfriend, and he don't need me anymore in his life :) This chapter of my life should be close and never open it again :) And another new chapter of my life should be open :) When the sunrises today, my life is full with great feelings. About the people around me :) Especially, someone :) I was hesitating who will be the one? Have got 5 in the hand :D Still I never get in an relationship :D Moving on with my life :) I didn't know that moving on in life can be so free and fun :) A moment, when I was sitting down in my playground, in Cameron Highland, I sat on the swing, started to think.. What is happiness? :) Can anyone tell me that answer? :) After a little while, I took out my camera and start to snap some pictures :) it is a nice feeling :) One of the picture that I've took, it is a really Emo one :) Which is one of my favourite :) Life can be full with colours :) Like some pictures of mine :) I always thought of black and white would be my colours :) Without knowing, I discovered that my life is painted with all kinds of colours! :) Like the someone special have painted my life :) I never felt love until I know how to move on :) Moving on is cool ;) Single is total~ :D A cold afternoon, talking with my grandaunt. I told her whatever that I was bothered with. And all my questions of life, have finally got an answer :) Here, I could find warmth, that I ever wanted :) Even the weather is so cold here :) I never want to go back :) I don't even want to look back now ! ~ :) I was laughing all day long. Everything seems so easy, just for today :) And when the sunset, I was walking on the road with my grandaunt. The road to CheFoo's School, seems so nice, that I thought I was in Heaven :) The sky, seems so blue. The trees are so green :) The air is fresh :) CheFoo School, was a school only for whites, 20 years back :) When I walked along that road, I felt that I was in England, Old England :) If my life would be so easy, isn't that great? :)

The Messages

When my heart will stop raining? And be sunny again? :(

Today is a sunny day. A cold morning... I was thinking about you, as your birthday is coming. Then, I went out for breakfast. And on my way to destination, I was reading the messages that you sent me. I was about to cry. Cause all the messages meant so much to me. I never delete it, I kept it. So that it reminds me of you. You will remain in my heart. Even though, I know that you will not like me anymore. Some time I was wondering, if you have liked me? Until now, after the heart broken day.. I am so in love, like I always do. There's no right or wrong in the word love. Right love hurts and so do Wrong love? No one actually know what does the word ''Love'' means. Love is a feeling? No? Yes? I told the people whom I knew that I won't be in a relationship with anyone. Nor when I reached the age 18. I am torn by the feeling that called love. I talked to my cousin about her crush. The boy and her are not meant to be, and she is still in love. So what does love really mean? My cousin ever asked me why does a girl got hurt more than a boy? In my life, this is the worst time... That I am hurt. :( <//3 Heart broken is really painful. So painful until it is always remembered deep inside. I know life is always like that, Happiness and Sadness.. After happiness it is just sadness.. And so after sadness it is Happiness. Just like the dark sky begin to rain and the rain stops it will be a sunny day again. So when my sunny day is going to come to me? It have been raining real bad in my heart :( When is that day coming? When, When and When?

Is this over?

Today is Chinese New Year, I am kinda happy.. Now I am listening to ''Your Call'' by Secondhand Serenade. I don't understand when suddenly your picture just came inside my head. Why can't I get over you? Why can't this be over? When can I get over you? :( I am suffering here. I was born because to find someone I love? Or someone to hurt me? I don't understand why is that so hard for me to get over you. I have told myself, there's many more fishes in the sea. And I don't know why I can't get over you. I believe some boys are much better than you. Now, I have got no more feeling towards you. Now you don't even call me anymore :( I haven't talk to you for awhile. Have you been thinking of me lately? Or are you getting on with your life? With some new girls? Some time when I see your name I will be shocked. I don't know why, and i don't understand why :( But, now I think I have someone else in my mind. All the boys, American, Belgian, Italian, German, Frenchman, and all kind of whatever not. I hope some time in the year you will call me and say hi. Your birthday is coming soon, so tell me.....What should I do? Call you? Ignore you? I remember last year, you called me the LAST minutes. I was so happy until I can't sleep at night! But now, it seems that everything have changed, in such a way that, I can't get out from you :( You are in my heart 24-7. And so do I?

The 4 words

I like you, boy :)

Thank you for telling me that you like me :) I was really happy when you said that! I went so high :) Was jumping and whatever not :P This is the first time when a guy confessed to me and never ask me for an answer... This is so unexpected :) Cause I really don't know that you will be in love with me :) I am not that kind of beautiful and amazing girl in the guy's eyes. I am nothing good.. But of course ... I do felt that you like me for what you have done :) Actually that day we went for the trip, while you were sleeping.. I can't stop looking at you... I am so afraid that I will fall in love again :( Which is what I don't want.. I've been hurt and I don't want this to happen again :( Before it happens I will stop all the feeling that I have inside me.. So then I stopped looking for awhile... But, no matter how much I looked away... My head will still be loosing control and looked at you again.. I realised that your eyelashes are really nice and long :) And you have the same nose as your dad :) I am so sorry for staring at you while you were sleeping...:S And Thank God .... The trip is only for the whole day.. Cause if it would have last longer, like a few days.. I can't tell you that I won't fall :) Cause I don't want to look at you every time.. :) Even I really want to, but I try not to ... :) I love the family photo that we have took that day when we returned to your house.. It was one of the best photo in my album :) And we do looked like a family, I think :P I printed them out. One is in my album, the other one is right in front of my bed where every morning I can see that photo and the last one I will put in my locker next year :) 11th of December was one of the best day after so many problems have happened... Which is the day we went for trip together :) And well... 14th of December too! Cause you confessed to me that you like me on that day :) And one question, why don't you ask me the answer? :-O You are not ready for the answer? Or you are scared that I am not ready with the answer? Anyway.. if I would have the chance to spend another one day with you.. I will tell you what I want to tell you everything inside me! I will tell you all! But sadly you are leaving me soon :( That's another reason why, I can't give you the answer.. Cause I don't have the confident to be with someone thousand miles away :( And on the other hand, I am not over someone yet ! :( If you can help me with that, I think we can be? When the Prom Night, I will tell you how I feel about you, what I think of you and everything JUST ABOUT YOU! I will tell you how amazing you are, How handsome you are, How great you are, How fabulous you are, How funny you are , How incredible you are, etc...... etc...! Thank you for protecting me or siding me when someone said that I am pure short! But she just insulted herself that way... CAUSE SHE IS NOT ANY TALLER! Prom Night, I will give you a big hug and a big kiss before you go! And of course.... I will tell you the four words that is inside me for a long long long time! which is '' I LIKE YOU TOO! '' I hope you can wait until Prom Night :) I will sure going to tell you that ! And another thing is that you are my Guardian Angel too :) And I felt happiness and love when I was with your family! :) THANK YOU, dear! :)

Happiness is just so east :)

Such a Great day :)

I never thought that he can be so funny :P He make me happy all the time when I am sad :) Just want to say Thank you to him :) He is such a good friend to me :) Thank you for asking me to go and have a trip with his family :) I really appreciate it :) I hope before he go, we all will have something like this again! He told me jokes and all that.. I just can't stop smiling when I was with his family yesterday :) Everything turned up great! Only that... we didn't go to the seaside :S Cause it was raining :( I was thinking to pick up some seashells and make some present for them :) But... I will find a way to get seashells after all ! When he was sleeping beside me in the car, I can't stop looking at his eyelashes :) It is so long and nice :) And I really need to give a big hug to his mum and his dad :) Cause his dad bought me a necklace :) A very simple one, but it is so cool and nice! And his mum, baked me some bun :) I really love it! And of course she gave me a big hug when I am leaving :) :D I will always remember today :) Today is the first time I ever get Xmas present :) And I got a small teddy bear, mug, Xmas hat and also a card :) Thank you so much for being like this to me! I will never forget about you when you return to your own country :( But... I will sure going to visit you!  I'll make sure that! I will never forget what you have said today :) I will remember every sentences that you have said :P it is one of my nicest and greatest memories :) Kiitos todella paljon! And I will make sure I will send something to you and your family! I have all the ideas in my head now! I really hope that you will appreciate the things I did! :) And you are one of my Guardian Angel too! :) :D

Tomorrow is a better day!

Everyone have their bad and good days :) I am sure tomorrow will be a better day! :) Tomorrow will be the 11th of December :) Will be one of the BEST day in the whole year of mine too! Guess what! I am going to have fun! So the one whom I am not over with .. Tomorrow I am going to forget about you! :) And I will find someone better! :) :D Don't ever think that you are the one and only in my life! I know I will still think of you some time! :) But I tell you what...... Time can prove everything! So I will and I can get over you! I don't know why when I call you every time you will not answer... I did worried about you.. But now I think it is wasting my time? :) Cause you have some one else to worry about for you :) And guess what again? :) I have some one else to worry about me :P So now I think you are nothing to me :) I know when I wrote this, I am breaking myself :) But, I am not going to think of you again! :) And the Teddy Bear that you bought for me the other day, I will keep it in a big box :) So that I don't hug it at night :) And so that I won't think of you again :) And the pictures, I will put it aside :) But I think.... better to burn it? :) Cause these memories, are the one that made me can't get over you :( I wish in my heart that some where in my body will have a reset button :) So I think of you no more! :) :D I want to get on with my life! :) I am sure some where near me, I can find my happiness :) Or even some where far :) My happiness is waiting for me, all around the world! :) And I will be an exchange student :P So now see who is the lucky guy :D I will fly over and get him myself ;) So.....!~ Get your own happiness! :) And comment on every girls' wall how beautiful and amazing they are! :) And YOU don't need to comment on mine! :) Cause all the guys are waiting to comment on it :P And you are just the LITTLE THING!  :D I felt so sorry for the guys out there now :) Cause I rejected them, because of you :P And now I am stupid cause you are not my Mr.Right! :P I think in the 10 of the boys out there, one of them will be! Well.... I don't like local people! :) So, I didn't count them in~! :) And I know I am not some one beautiful for you! I am not amazing! But according to my Guardian Angels :) I am beautiful, incredible, funny, cute, amazing, special and fantastic! Why can't YOU see me through their eyes?

I shouldn't see that :(

I shouldn't see what I've saw :( I saw the comments that you have commented on the other girl's wall.. Well, you stated there that she is wonderful and beautiful, you have never seen one! Am I really that ugly to you? If yes, don't confess to me at the very first time! You have NEVER EVER   comment on my pictures :( You have NEVER like any of my pictures :( Is clicking a 'like' button a tough job for you?? If it is, I am very happy to know that! I can't believe what I saw with my own eyes. :''''''''( I am your girlfriend, and yet you commented on the other girl's picture instead :'( Am I a big shame to you? That you dare not to tell your friends that you are in a relationship with me? I thought you will be proud of me! :( Why are we like this now? :( What happened to our relationship????? Why can a guy just come to me and say to me every time that ''Michelle, you are beautiful'' ...... WHY can't you? And I am your GIRLFRIEND! I know I am not that type of girl, who is beautiful enough to let you comment on! When I saw what you've commented on that girl's wall.. I wasn't angry nor sad. All I was thinking is to stand under the rain! And wake myself up under the heavy rain! :( To all the guys out there, I am super number ONE! They said that I am very special.. What am I in your eyes?!?!~ A toy? Which you think when you are fed-up of me and put me aside??? I am crying hard when I wrote this. I don't believe what I've saw :( And yet it is true! PLEASE~ ..... some one come to me and tell me it is not true! I know I am nothing to you! Two is better than one? One is better than two now! I always hope that you will be my Guardian Angel :( Cause last time you will ALWAYS be there... When I need you.. Nowadays, I don't know what the hell you go when I need you SO MUCH!  Ended up----> some guys come and comfort me! Do you think, they have took your place?? They are my Guardian Angels now! But not YOU! Do you ever think this is what I want? My song title was right! '' WE AREN'T MEANT TO BE''~! And I have guys out there! Don't ever think that I can't live without you! I am aright and it is OKAY! I will tell the whole world I am much better without you! I know I am going to miss you like damn MUCH! But you DON'T  worth my tears! I've cried for you! And now I am trying to go on without you~! I know this is a tough job! But I'm sorry! Humans are all selfish! I am not going to give a damn about you! I said this, and I meant it! If you want me back, I don't think I will be there! Just hope some day I will change my mind again! Now is a good time, where I think it is time to move on! So if you call me some day, just be sure I will pick up! Cause, I have nothing to say to YOU!

This song is for you :)



SONG WRITTEN BY : Michelle Wong

we aren't meant to be :(

Verse1:

A thousand of sweet memories of you and me together

it's all I have of you and me

and that's all
we were so in love and we thought
we were meant to be forever
but broken apart by our thoughts
Chorus:
I won't cry for you
and I try not to miss you
but the toughest thing I have to do
is forget 'bout you
and I wondered
how can I do so?
Verse2:
Searching reasons why we can't be together
it's all I'm thinking of
day and night
don't you know that I'm not over you?
I'm stupid to fall in love with you
cause I know that you won't catch me
it's amazing that I love you
with all the broken pieces inside me
Chorus:
I won't cry for you
and I try not to miss you
but the toughest thing I have to do
is forget 'bout you
and I wondered
how can I do so?
Verse3:
Thank you for what you've gave
what you've done and things you said
I'm still not over you
can you please turn around?
come back to me
so I won't dream without you tonight

I just want you now

Chorus:

I won't cry for you

and I try not to miss you

but the toughest thing I have to do

is forget 'bout you

and I wondered

how can I do so?

Never want to wait again :(

Don't break the promise, that you promised

If you have a good memory, I think you could remember I'd waited for you in a shopping mall for 7 hours. That day you broke my heart badly. I never did waited for someone for so long! I wasn't angry, but I was so sad and heartbroken :( That day was few days before I am going to China. You never apologize to me, until few days later. I am happy that you did :) And I called you when I was in China. I never forget you, no matter where I am :) But how about you? Will you remember me? I asked this Question because I know I can never ever forget you in life.. Because YOU are the one that I love the most and who hurt me the most. Do you know that? I'd waited for you about a year and a half. I never get angry at you even though I'd waited for 7 hours in the shopping mall. Cause I know compared to one year and a half, 7 hours are just little thing :(

FlashBack :(

Can I have that smile again?

I never want to remember you again! But today when I went to the shop where you bought me that teddy bear :( Suddenly I remember you :( I just hated you so much, Dear :( You broke my heart into pieces :( But do you know.. even then, I love you with all the small little pieces that have broken :'(  Today I went to that shopping mall where we used to go :( Now, I am all by myself.... I was walking on the stairs and that's where I broke my heart again :( The escalator, where we used to hugged and kissed :( I hate you! I hate you! If you don't like me tell me! Don't make me guess what you are thinking! And no silent break up! I know deep in my heart, love will not last :( Maybe I was naive, thought that you will love me until our life end :(  you make me smile when I am sad. Now I am DAMN SAD! But where are you now??? Lost?! Leave me alone :( Please! I never want to dream about you :(  It's nightmare, too much of sweet memories :( I don't need them now :(

A new Start :)

Germany :)

The first day of school after a long holiday, you gave me your jacket. I love it a lot :) This jacket is with me all the time. I wear it in school. I bring it along when I go for a trip :) It is kind of thick, really warm, it is like you are with me when I wear it :) But now I can't wear it in school :( Cause of the new school rules :S So stupid!~ And you gave me your school sweater too :) Mostly all the time I will wear it and now it is mine :D If I am not mistaken you only wore it once :S I am so sorry about that :D Thank you for giving me so much things, because of all these, I don't feel alone :) I could feel that you are with me all the time :) But I know some day you will leave me :( I never want this to happen :( Cause I love you a lot! But..... Fate :( Some time I will think that God is fooling me around with you :S I don't know what He will make my life with you to be :(

Valentine's Day

Wonder if you can REMEMBER?

Thank you for the rose that you have gave me last year Valentine's Day. Even though it was just one rose.. I kept it until now, I will never forget :) Thank you! After you gave me that rose, I brought it back to class.. Everyone was wondering, who is the one who gave me. Everyone started guessing.. But no one says your name :P Some boys were kidding angry... :) That rose have a great smell after so long for keeping it. I put it on my table where every time when I wake up I could see it! And that remind me of you! I am happy! I hope next year I will get roses from you. If that time, you can still remember me. Which I know, you won't :( That time you will have your new life and me? Thinking of you day and night? Daydream about you? Even when I sleep, I see you in my dream every time! I have been thinking too much of you!

Birthday Present



My hard work :) [second]

If you still can remember your birthday this year, what I have gave you. Maybe this can be a part of memory of yours... It is also a very good memory to me. I never thought of making something for your birthday. But I think this year is different. That's my hard work, if you can feel it. But, I don't think you will :( It's just so sad! It's okay, because all I have done is worth at the end, because you smiled. :) And I asked my friend to baked you a cake, and I took it to your classroom. After that you hugged me! That time I was sick (fever), but because I wanted to give you that cake so I go to school. Anyway, when you hugged me..... I felt so warm :) and that time my body temperature is going higher too :) Most probably my face was like an apple at the moment :) which is a good thing!  I wondered if you can remember my birthday? :S I hoped you will be the first one who wish me! :)